Saturday, May 9, 2009

SECRET RECIPE

Various Dr Pepper available in the USImage via Wikipedia

Today a man in Texas discovered the original secret recipe to Dr Pepper.

The browning, torn alchemy book was stuck under a crate in an antique shop, society having abandoned the expensive, time consuming tradition of using natural ingredients and manual labor.

Way back then, there was no high fructose corn syrup, liquid caffeine, or preservatives. Instead, the doctor used mandrake root, sweet flag, and syrup.

The man offered to sell the handwritten recipe to the company so they could maintain their lifeblood, their secret, but they laughed.

Nothing is as it used to be, so nothing is sacred.

Friday, May 1, 2009

AGE IS A BITCH


Elsa hated this job.

It wasn’t too long ago that she was in the islands doing bathing suit shoots, staying in the best five star hotels, being wooed by the richest and best looking men. Now she’s in a dirtied up backlot pimping shoes for print ads and they won’t even show her face for fear of losing their younger crowd.

If someone had told her that by 30 she’d be a washed up model with no career, no savings, no friends, and no future, she would have stayed in Idaho and married Tommy Keebler and raised his babies.
Elsa’s shoulders sagged as she sighed heavily, searching her brain to find the silver lining in this stormy raincloud she called her life.

Hell, she still had great legs and after this shoot, she’d have a kickass pair of shoes, too.